Ladies and Gentlemen as
(Groom’s) Best Man tonight I have an opportunity some siblings go
a lifetime waiting for – the chance to embarrass my brother in front of an
audience comprising all the people ** ***** *** ***** *** ***** *** **** *** * ******** **** ** *********** ** ***** * **** ** **** *** *********** *** ****** * *** ***** ** ** ************** ******* * **** *** ****** **** ** ********** ** *** ****** ***** ** ****** **** ************ ********* ** ****** ** *** ****** ******************** ***** *** ********* *** **** **** *** ****** ******** ***** ** ********* ** ***** ******** *********** ***** *************
That title “brides - maid”
is one I’ve always been baffled by, why would anyone accept ** ********** ** ** *********** **** *** *** ********** ** ** **** ******* **** ** ********* *** * **** **** ** ******* ****** ****** ** *** ************** ******* *** ***** ************** *** ****** ***** ** *** *** ***** *** ************ ******** *** *** **** ******** ******* ***** ***** *** ** *** *** **** ***** *** ****** ****** ***** ************* *********** * ******** ***** **** * ************ *********** ***** ** *** ** **** * *** ******* ******** ***** ****** **** ********* *** *** ** **** ** **** ***** **** **** ** ************* *************** ** ********* ******************
Fortunately my own title for
today is not “Groom’s butler” but “Best Man” and it’s one **** ***** * ** ****** **** ************ *** **** **** ** ******* **** *** * *** ***** *** ***** *** ***** ** **** ***** * *** *** ** *** ******* ********* **** ** ** ***** ** **** * ***** ******** ******* *** ** *** ********** *** ****** ** *** **** **** ********** **** **** **** ***** *** **************
Don’t get me wrong my job has not
been all together stress free.
Ensuring that (Groom) ******** *** *** ******* *********** ********** ****** *** ******** ***** *** ********* *** *************** ***** **** *** **** **** *** **** *************** ***** * *** ** *** *** ** ***** ******** ** **** ******* ********* *** ************* ****** ** ********************
Keeping the rings shiny and safe
provided some worry but no doubt my biggest challenge was ******** **** ********* *** ***** **** *** ************ ********** ** ****** ******** *** **** ** ****** *** ****** ******* *** *** *** **** **** ****** ****************** *** *** *** **** ********* *** *** ** *** ****** ******* **** *** **** ** ***** *********** ***** *** ****** ** *** *** *** *** *************** **** * *** *** * ******** * **** ** ******** **** *** **** ***** ** ****** *** ****** ** *** **** ** **** ********* ****** ** ********* **** ******* ********
(The following paragraph
should be included if there is a humorous anecdote about the Groom you **** ** ************* ** *** **** *** ** ******** ****** ****** *** ******** * *** *** ** **** *** **** **** **** ** **** ****** *** *** * *** **** ***** * ** ***** **** * *********** ** ******** *** * ********** **** ** ******** ** ********* **** ************ **************** **** *** ** ***** *********** ******** **** ******** **** ** ** * *** ********* ** ***** ******** ***** ***** ********* ******* ** ***** **** ** **** ** ***** ** *********** ************** ** ******** ** ******** ****** *** ** ******* ********* ** ************** ******* ** **** ******** ******** *******************
You have, no doubt, already
ascertained that good looks, brains, wit and charm are very distinctive ****** **** *** ****** **** ********** **** ******* ** *** **** ***** ************** ** ** ***** ******* * ********** **** ** * *********** * **** ******** ** ******* ********** *** ** ** ********* ****** **** *** ** * ****** ** *** ******** ******* ** **** *** **** ******* ****** ***** **** ******* *** *************
Considering the countless DNA
tests my confused parents demanded to ensure no hospital mix up responsible *** ****** ******* ******** ** *** ****** ** ***** ** *********** **** **** ********* ** ****** ** ***** ******** * ** ************ ********* ** *********** **** **** **** ****** ** *** ******* *********** ******* *** *** ** ** * ***** *** *** ******** ***** **** ** **** *** **** ** ******* *** *** ** **** **** ***** ******* ************ *** * **** **** **** ********** *** **** ***** * ******* *** *** ****** ***** *** **** ****** *** ********** ************ ** **** **** **** ********* ** ************** *** *** **** ** *********** ***** ** *** * ****** ****** *** ********
At this point I must concede that
there is in fact one genetic trait that (Groom) ****** **** ** * ******* ***** ** ************ **** *** ******** ** ********* * ***** ** ******** *********** **** ***** *** ********* * **** ****** **** *** ** **** ***** ** ******** ******* ***** **** *** *********** * **** **** **** ******* ***** ****** *** *** ****** ****** ** *** ***** ***************** **** ********* *** ******** *** *** ******* ************* ** *** ************* ** **** ****** *** ******** ***** ** **** ********* *** **************** *** *** ********* ********** ** *********** **** * *** *** ****** ********
The thing that shocked me most at
our first introduction was that (Bride) not only surpassed *** ******** **** ************ ******* *** *** *** **** ** *** **** *** ****** ****** **** **** ******* ********** ** ** ************ **************** *** ******* *** ******** **** ** ****** ** ************* *** **** *** *** ** **** *** *** **** *** ******** ** **** ********** **** * ** ***** **** *** **** ***** ******** ******** *** ******* ********* ***** ********* ** **** **** ***** * *** ** * ******* *** ***************** **** **** * ****** *** **************** **** *** **** ************ ******* *** *** ****** ** **** *** **** ** ** ******* ******** ** **** ** ** ********* ** **** ** ******* ***** *** **** ** *** ****** ******** ******* *** * **********************
(Groom) you may be
the butt of my jokes some times and a pain in the **** ** ************ * *** * *** * ****** ***** **** ************ * **** ** *** **** *** *** ** ****** ***** **** ****** ****** *** ** ********* ************ **************** * ***** *** *** ******** ********* **** *** ****** *** *** ************* * ***** *** **** *** *** ***** ** ********** ****** *** ***** *** ****** ** *** * ******** ** ********* ***************** *** * *** *** **** ****** ***** ********** ** ***** **** ******* *** ***** ** **** **** *** *** *** ****** ***** ********* ** ** ************ ***** * **** ******* *** ******* *** ***** **** *********** ***** *** *** **** ********* ********* ***************** ** ******* ***** ******** ****** ********** ** **** * ***** ********
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